Definitions
-Just sayin' (phrase) - I do not take any responsibility for the comment I just made.
-Paranoia (noun) - That feeling you get after answering "B" for the last five questions.
-Amusement (noun) - Watching your teacher spend 90% of the class time attempting to work the SmartBoard.
-Happiness (noun) - When you roll onto the warm spot your laptop left in your bed. See also: loneliness.
-Anticipation (noun) - 11:10.
Facts
-Math problems are the only place where someone can buy 60 watermelons and no one wonders why.
-No matter how good you are at something there is always an 8 year old Asian that is better.
-The Amish will never read this.
-The chances of you dying on the way to get your lottery tickets is greater than winning.
-Violence is never the answer. Unless the question is, "What is never the answer?"
-Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
To Do List
-Buy a parrot. Teach the parrot to say, "Help! I've been turned into a parrot!"
-Change Facebook name to "No One." Like people's statuses...
-Change iPod name to "Titanic." Download new songs. Be amused by the fact that the Titanic is syncing.
-Put sign on door that reads "Dumble."
-Wear shirt that says "Life." Hand out lemons on street corner.
-Buy four pigs. Paint 1, 2, 3, and 5 on each pig. Let them loose in a mall and watch security try to find number 4.
-Buy a turtle. Name it "The Speed of Light." Tell everyone that I can run faster than "The Speed of Light."
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